things i like to do

I like to go home via Sydney Road late at night. I avoid the road during the day because it’s so busy, but I like being driven up it at night because it’s interesting. I ride up it late Thursday night (if you watch out you might see me riding up it tonight at some point between 11pm and 12.30am), but that’s getting increasingly scary. It used to be empty and ‘safe’ but now it’s full of wanker ‘I’m so cool’ kids spilling out of The Spot and The R… pub that starts with R whose name I always forget and the grotty bars full of old furniture. I don’t like those sorts of people.
But I do like riding straight up Sydney Road, having gone up Queen Street, through the Vic Markets car park, along William Street and then through the roundabout of death.
When we’re riding east from Sydney Road The Squeeze always asks if we can take this one particular side street. I once saw a giant bunny looking out at the road through the gate of a house on that street, and The Squeeze has only seen it once. So we ride down that road hoping to see it again. We haven’t.
I like to ride down through the parking lot at the Vic Markets on my way to dancing on Thursday nights. I come down William Street, past the top of the markets and then down through the carpark. There are usually millions of seagulls hanging about in there and I love riding my bike down through the crowd of them, yelling. It’s slightly downhill, and a big, empty space. There’s never anyone around and it’s dark and empty. It’s a bit scary because I could hit something and fly off my bike, or the seagulls could decide to pull a Hitchcock on me, but those thoughts just make the whole thing more fun.
I like riding to the Laundry (a venue) on Saturday afternoons to see local jazz band called Virus. The band’s made up of a raggle taggle of younger doods and older doods who really know their shit. There’s no sheet music, they share the solos around during the song, and visiting musicians from out of town drop in to do a guest song or two. This is proper jazz – sometimes they check the sheet music before the song, but not always. The decide what to play on the spot – there are no set lists. They take requests. They wear scrappy clothes (shorts and thongs, dress pants and tshirts, ill fitting suit coats with jeans), drink a lot of beer and make crude jokes. The music is fricking fast, fricking hot and fricking good – it kicks your arse if you’re dancing.
The venue is narrow and loud and crowded and smokey. We dance sometimes, but mostly we drink beer. That’s how jazz should be – loud and fun and crowded and with lots of heckling (between the band and the audience). Not with rules about not talking and turning off your mobile phone. Heck, you’re lucky if you can hear your mobile ring at the Laundry. This gig is on every single Saturday afternoon between 4 and 7 and is free. After we’ve seen the band, we usually go to eat somewhere. It’s lots of fun, but it makes you stink like a dirty old pub floor.
Go to the cinema on my own during the day to see lady films and art house films. Long, boring things with no action scenes. I like to get a chilli chocolate ice cream if I’m at the Nova or a bag of joobs if I’m at the Westgarthe.
I like to go to the Astor for a double session on the weekend, though I haven’t done that many times.
I like going to fabric shops and spending hours and hours in there choosing fabric.
I like doing the same at the video shop.
And in music shops.
I like riding down through Royal Park from Royal Parade, down the path past the stadium and giant play ground to the cemetary and then down to Lygon Street. It’s all a bit brown and dry and crispy these days, but it’s still a nice ride.
I like it that bikes and trams get a green light on Swanston Street at the intersection of Swanston and… LaTrobe? Where Melbourne Central is. I like being able to zoom off at the lights while the cars are left at the lights, cranky.
I like riding my bike through the Edinborough Gardens, past the giant possums at night and around the fountain during the day. Even though you’re not allowed to. I ride carefully so I don’t hit anyone.
I like going to Brunetti’s and having an Italian hot chocolate with a tiny biscuit and reading my book.