May 9, 2006

could this be cabin fever?

Posted by dogpossum on May 9, 2006 2:50 PM in the category domesticity

It's cold and windy (ah, the downside of Melbourne in the autumn - overcast skies, endless Antarctican winds, rain. rain. rain),
I have some serious muscle tension in my right shoulder/back/neck which is trying to become a headache,
I'm worried about an article I have to submit on the 20th which isn't re-edited yet (because my supervisor(s) can't keep up with my prodigiously productive brain. hell, my productivity is scaring even me at the moment),
our lounge room is full of drying laundry that smells odd,
I'm in that difficult blanket - quilt interum period, where it's too hot for a proper quilt, but too cold for less than 6 blankets (whose weight no doubt contributes to my muscle tension, seeing as how I can't roll over in bed as I'm pinned to the mattress by 60million blankets) so I'm not sleeping properly, or having weirdo, too-hot dreams about superheroes (all sans cape),
I'm sewing obsessively (they're nice camel needle cord trousers. why thankyou, but it's not camel - it's sand. only $4 a metre),
I can't face cooking or doing the washing up (Saigon City, you are going Down - no more home deliver for US, thank you very much),
mysterious boxes keep arriving (as per usual - I see the parcel guy nearly every day), but they're never for me (seeing as how I can't afford to buy anything more often than once every couple of months - and then only cheap CDs) and they're never worth opening as they're always cords or bits of computer and boring if you're not an uber-nerd,
did I mention the muscle tension? ow! Dang, I need more exercise, but anxiety-induced malaise and autumn weather are not condusive to long bike rides or step-step-triple-step practice,
I love my yoga mat, especially now it no longer smells weird. Was it wrong to hose it in the backyard?
I've just read some fascinating articles on the phenomenology stuff, but half of me is distressed because it's way too late in the thesis progress to discover important articles and I'm not sure I'm buying this bullshit phenomenology crap,
I think I have that thing where 9months pregnant women suddenly aren't sure they want to go through with this. What will I do without my thesis? You know you have to give it away as soon as it's done, don't you?
I'm partway through a crazed Buffy re-veiwing obsessession. Somewhere in season 3 (best season ever), and I'm still getting at least one good scare (though usually 2-3) for each 2 episodes we watch a night. I get startled/scared easily. I think it's because, when we were young, my brother and I went through a prolonge phase of scaring the bejesus out of each other. We'd wait behind doors or under beds and then jump out at the other, yelling "YAH!" to scare the other. And it worked. Thing is, the more scares you get, the more easily scared you are. Plus there's the whole anticipationn-of-a-scare thing. I mean, we both thought it was neat, even when we were scared and angry-laughingly chasing the other round the house for retribution. But still. I'm still a trembly leaf person. And I've noted that (having just leapt out of the larder at our p's house, after huddling silently in wait for ages, fleeing from my life from my hulking younger brother, both of us giggling like fools, leaping cats and ignoring shouted 'stop shouting! calm down!' threats from the ps) that he's just as susceptible to the scare as I am. What have we done to each other? Made it impossible to watch scary films? Or perhaps made scary films that much more exciting for ourselves?
I'm dancing like crap. Like real, terrible, awful crap. I need to work on my dancing to get better, but it's just not a priority in my life at the moment (not when I have trousers to make).

could this be cabin fever?

yoga. I need yoga. Thank god class is on tonight!

Posted by dogpossum on May 9, 2006 2:50 PM in the category domesticity