sorry

JBsalute.jpg

I’m glad I’m not the only one who cried like a freakin’ baby watching the ABC this morning. I cried and cried. It was just nice to see such a mark of respect. I kept thinking ‘those aboriginal doods are the first aboriginal people – the first indigenous Australians to be given such formal respect, EVER!’ It was just so exciting and wonderful. Sure, there were some problems with that second speech there, but still – it was like, all of a sudden, Australia had suddenly realised that there were people who’d been here before the skips rocked into town. Like they went, “Holy shit! We’ve had our heads up our bums for 200 years! Let’s get on it, STAT!”
I know it’s only a symbol, but holy moly, if that doesn’t give good evidence to the power of symbols, I don’t know what would. That was some seriously hot shit. Now I have an idea how people feel when they go to the dawn service for Diggers or put up flags in their front yard. It was like, all of a sudden, I had a reason to be really proud of being Australian. It was like, amazingly, even though people had been doing fuckful things for 200 years, and then refusing to admit they’d been fuckful, they suddenly, really, did think “Oh, man. That was some bad shit. We have to apologise.” And then they did! I was just proud. It was like a couple of kids had suddenly realised they were being mean to another little kid and apologised to him all on their own. Now I’m hoping they’ll be taking that kid home for detty-and-a-bandy before out to the back yard for a rousing game of tiggy.
And I was also really struck by the power of turning your back on someone. No fisticuffs, no nasty retorts. Just turning away. I think that’s a nice alternative to bombing the shit out of people. I know it’s the solution I’ve used on discussion boards when I’ve had a gutful of sexist dickheads, or I’m dealing with trolls, but who’d have thought it would be so useful when dealing with the Liberal party? And that it just keeps getting more effective?
For those who are about to reconcile, we salute you.
edit: and I’m just thinking: it’s the overwhelming symbolism of having those elders in parliament while they were speaking. I just kept thinking, ‘it’s like they didn’t exist before. And now, all of a sudden, parliament has discovered they exist. They’re recognising them, and they’re honouring them’. I know that’s problematic in itself, but goddamn, I just can’t get over it.

sour grapes

Reading this rant here (and it is a rant, and I do think we should all allow ourselves the luxury of ranting on our blogs – that’s the delight of self-publishing, no?), my immediate thought was “that’s a bit rich.” I mean, the author is one of those young-gun rock star type American academics. She’s sporting a whole lot of academic and social privilege which plebs like myself really don’t have access to.
I also thought “hey, I have a paper in that journal!” And I am, I must admit, extremely excited about my article (it’s a nice one about YouTube and dancers and I’m quite proud of it). It’s not in that special issue of the journal, though it was initially accepted and later politely knocked back (I guess it was bumped for some rock star, right?). As I said, I’m feeling quite chuffed about being in this journal – it’s an International, donchakno? So I’m not all that cool reading that post – what does that make me, sister? Some sort of publisher’s stooge (I wish, I wish – I am so ready to be some publisher’s stooge).
So reading that article, I was a little bit… pooped. I mean, I don’t really think it’s all that cool to snub the very source of a serious part of your cred and status. That’s the action that’s getting her a career. That’s the action that’ll help me get a permanent job (anyone else just loving these semester-by-semester positions? Empowering, no? Terribly punk, yes?) and fund my future jazz spending (wait, I’ll tell you about today’s presents later). That’s the stuff that’ll make the past…15 years of work mean something.
I’m sorry, homegirl, you can’t go making those sorts of calls without expecting some sort of kick up the bum… or perhaps just a polite throat clearing and measured response.
This one by Anne is my favourite so far. I also like Jason’s comment on the original article and his blog entry. You can chase the other responses around the internet yourselves, but you can see the sorts of responses that sat bestest with me.
I think, from my position here, as:

  • casually employed lecturer
  • unemployed researcher
  • just-finished-(no corrections! – sorry, but I need to remind myself at times like these) PhD-person
  • self-employed article-writer and book-maker (oh yes, I can’t help but squeeze those papers out – it’s like blogging: must share, look-at-me-look-at-me-look-at-me!, God, am I the only one?)
  • serial paper-giver/self-humiliator

I’d be kissing internet arse, making like I was the biggest bitch o’ the establishment ever if I was in that position.
I mean, isn’t that the scam? We get in there, softly, softly, then we make with the rabble rousing on the quiet, like?
And, finally, the other immediate thought that I had when first reading that initial post was, “hells bells, woman, we’re working in universities, not Médecins Sans Frontières“. Yes, it’d be really nice to think that we were actually out there making people’s lives wonderful, fighting the good fight and all, but at the end of the day we’re working within institutions whose primary goal is to institutionalise people. And to make money. I think it’s a little naive to think that universities now – if ever! – have ever really been about freeing minds, making jiggy with the knowledge and all. I know it’s a wonderful idea, but in practice… let’s be realistic here. Researching and writing in universities is privileged stuff. It’s not easy – it’s damn hard work, especially for n00bs – but it’s pretty freakin’ good work.
And sure, let’s say our academic articles are suddenly free and available to the whole universe. Does that mean that they’re suddenly also well written, accessible and meaningful to most people? I don’t think so… There’s far more to be done to make academic work the people’s work than simply avoiding old school journals. And I do feel that there’s some sort of …arrogance? to the idea that just because our academic work’s out there in the ‘public sphere’ that people’d actually want to read it. Pft. I don’t think so. You know they’d really rather look at kitties. I had that idea when I started in on my PhD work. But maybe that’s just dancers – no time for academic wankery.
…I can’t help thinking about this as I type this. I might be one of those types.

(insert dumb pun about listening to me here)

I’ve been thinking about this in relation to dancers. I’m not sure if dancers are really where they’re heading with that project thought – I think that’s a bit serious and got some political work going on. Dancers just seem kind of … frivelous in comparison. But perhaps that’s interesting in itself. Perhaps it’s worth talking about listening as ‘fun’ as well in terms of participation in serious public discourse.
But I’d like to write about ‘listening with the body’ and the way dancers (especially DJs) listen to music with an ear to dancing. And how partner dancers share the way they hear the music by getting in closed position (and open! because lindy hoppers are badass and don’t need closed to communicate!) and just feeling the way the other person is moving their body. And the truly wonderful, amazing thing about partner dancing is that this isn’t conscious – if we had to stop consciously think ‘hm, how is my partner feeling the beat here?’ the whole thing would collapse. It’s about training your muscles to respond automatically to physical stimuli.
Here’s an example: one of my first ever yoga classes the instructor was pushing on my back, right about where the leader puts their hand. He said “stop pushing back – let me push you into place”. I didn’t even notice that I was pushing back – it was just a matter of, as a follow, my ‘giving back what I was getting’ – returning equal pressure to make a nice connection. So I had to learn to let him move my body about without returning pressure.*
Any how, when you’re partner dancing, you’ve got all this stuff going on in your body, unconsciously. And then the music starts. And your lead ‘sets the tone’ of the relationship/partnership for the dance – they tell you how they feel the bounce (nice and big and Swedish? Miserly and American? Horrifically absent?), and that bounce is the easiest way for you to keep in time – you bounce along to the beat. The harder the music swings (ie the less on-the-beat-abrupt-yuck it is – the longer the delay between beats, the more time squeezed out of every beat), the more time you have to do deeper bounces (this is where I just can’t articulate it – it’s something you have to see and feel), etc etc.
And because you’re a team, you give back an idea of how you’re feeling the music. If they’re a great lead (which is congruent to being a great person in this instance), they’ll respond and incorporate your feeling into the partnership, so it’s not all one-way.
And all this before you even move! You’re still in place just checking each other out, ‘listening’ to the music.
And it’s even more complicated it it’s live music – the band is feeling each other out, they might be checking out the dancers…
It’s all very interesting. Improvisation makes music so much more fun and challenging – anything can happen. So you all have to have really nice connection so you can communicate. You’ve all got to be giving back what you’re getting. Equal pressure.
Any how, I think it’s interesting. And I’m going to send in an abstract, but I’m not sure they’ll dig it. We’ll see.
I’m finding people think my dance stuff is kind of hippy dippy. I feel like one of those fruit loops you meet at conferences who give papers about…, well, that weirdo, completely off-the-wall, nothing to do with anything stuff. I think people hear ‘dance’ and think the way they do when they hear ‘ficto-critical’. But most academics simply don’t dance, ever. And most have never partner danced more than once or twice. And that’s especially the case as the last generation of ackas retire. It kind of proves my point, though – anyone who dances regularly doesn’t think ‘woah, fruit loop’. They give dance as much importance as music or visual texts…
…after all, how come we’re all so keen on words and less interested in nonverbal communication? I mean, I’m not that much of a hippy dippy type. I don’t have any time for crystals or faith healing or past lives. I mean, I even find improvised ‘arty’ dance discomforting (“I’m a tree, I’m a flower!”).
…ok, now I’m ranting and being mean about hippies. I guess I can’t get on that wagon if I grow my own veggies (go tomatoes (even if you are eating my clothes line)! go mutant lettuce refugees! go unbelievable amounts of passion fruit!) using compost from the compost bin (go incredible fertiliser!), don’t bother with makeup or leg shaving (w the goddamn f?), don’t understand high heels and take less time getting ready to go out than The Squeeze. And that no car/love bike thing? Not exactly pushing me to the mainstream.
But come on – you know what I mean when I’m talking about the fruit loop types. That’s not me, ok? I’m, like, TOTALLY normal! Rrlly!!1!!
*aside: this is where I feel ‘compression’ comes from – you give back the pressure your partner gives you (unless they’re super-tense, but that’s a different story). For the equilibrium made by that equal-return of pressure to become them actually moving you, you allow the pressure to build up until it sort of ‘tips’ you over into moving. It’s really hard to explain, but it’s not a matter of just immediately doing as your partner moves you – you have to return the pressure until you reach the point of ‘critical mass’ where they then initiate movement. There are all sorts of other things going on (including what they’re doing with their bodies – are they moving their body weight?), but it’s sort of working around that idea.

slim gaillard’s Laughing in Rhythm and Fats Waller and his Rhythm, the Last Years 1940-1943

Two new arrivals:
Slim Gaillard’s Laughing in Rhythm. Can’t believe I’ve only just bought this. I am so the slowest, uncoolest DJ on the block. I mean, I’ve bought bits and pieces from places like itunes, but still. It’s a bit late. I’d still like the giant Gaillard Proper set, but I just can’t bring myself to buy all that nonsense singing…


Fats Waller and his Rhythm, the Last Years 1940-1943. I now own about 60 million Waller CDs. And I’m not quite sure that’s enough.

teaching tools

So I’m all lined up to do some serious teaching next semester. The bit that I’m most interested in is coordinating the subject I did last semester. I’ll be able to put together a reader that suits what I’m teaching, I’ll get to rework some of my weaker lectures and tutorials, and I’ll be able to redo the assessment. There’s lots of admin work involved, but I’m actually not too bad at that stuff – MLX has made me strong. Plus I quite like the ob-con-ness of sorting and organising and making lists.
One of my first jobs will be getting some feedback from the sessional staff who taught with me on that subject last year. I want to know what worked, what didn’t, what they’d like to see on the subject (or ditched).
The next job will be working through the lectures and reworking the weeks – dumping the dumb stuff, strengthening the good stuff, adding in some useful stuff that was missing last year. I’m aiming for your basic intro to media studies/communications/cultural studies subject, including some really safe, useful ‘textual analysis tools’ (this is something the department really wants), some stuff about media industries and some stuff about audiences. I’m (mentally) dividing the subject up into those three parts (n those that order), and hoping to have three manageable (and hopefully cumulative rather than discrete) pieces of assessment to go with each (though that’s something that needs to be discussed).
I’d like a reader that had a greater emphasis on Australian cultural/media studies (especially in reference to the industry stuff… for obvious reasons), and including some more up-to-date readings (ie not stuff from the 80s… unless it’s something particularly important or awesome).
I’m also keen on strengthening the weekly tutorial exercises. I’m ordinarily not the hugest fan of this stuff, but this type of weekly mini self-assessment is important and can be really useful. Putting together a comprehensive weekly exercise (which isn’t too long) is also a nice way of making sure I structure my lectures properly (which I’m kind of anal about anyway), make the readings really relevant and giving the students an idea of the most important points in that week’s topic.
All this is for a first year subject, so I have to keep it pretty simple. It also has to work as a ‘teaser’ for later subjects – it has to convince these guys in the general arts degree that media studies/cultural studies/communications is fun and interesting and useful.
I’m a big fan of multimedia components in the teaching and learning tools, but I was very unhappy with webct last year. I’m not sure it’s a good idea to get into moodle or another hardcore online teaching tool. But I do think it’s important to have some sort of online component, particularly for teaching across campuses, and teaching students who don’t spend much time on campus.
I am thinking about just using a plain, simple blog. Something like this one (but obviously not this one) which is super easy to navigate, allows me to embed youtube clips, add in useful links, upload lecture notes, etc. I do have reservations about uploading lecture notes to a public forum, though. This is where it’s actually a good idea to have a site where you must log in to get the good stuff.
I have considered other options like druple (bllurgh) and plone, but if I’m going that way, I really think I should use something designed for teaching – like moodle or webct. But I don’t think it’s a good idea to have students learn how to use a whole new system/site, just for one subject. And I’m not keen on learning myself – it’s not really worth the effort.
I also think it’s a good idea to use sites that students are already comfortable with. For obvious reasons. This of course leads us straight to faceplant and myspace. But I’m not happy with faceplant. I don’t want to encourage students to use such a massive data-gathering business tool.
There is, however, the google option. Google docs is something we’re considering using for MLX this year – a central collection point for files and discussions and email and things. But once again, it does require students learning a new system, signing up for new accounts and so on.
So my questions are:
– is it ok to use a blog where the lecture notes are public? My feeling is no.
– should I use something like plone which can have a public ‘face’ yet also requires students to log in to access notes?
– should I just suck it up and use webct?
All of this is very interesting and quite exciting. I’m looking forward to teaching with confidence material I know well, and to being able to strengthen what I’ve already done without starting from scratch. It’ll also be nice to not be working to such a full-on, heinous schedule, writing lectures as I go through the semester.

oh man

I am trying to watch So You Think You Can Dance, and it’s really hard. It’s really crap.
But there are fleeting glimpses of dancers I know (Trev! Trev! Trev!), and I’m half thinking of writing a paper on it. Maybe doing some interviews with dancers. Maybe something about the way ethnicity and dance and bodily aesthetics are represented in SYTYCD.
But it’s really freaking painful. The worst bit is the way the judges have a small group step forward to be humiliated. It’s all a bit lame. I know it’s all orchestrated for a specific reality TV formula, but it feels far more forced than the American versions. So I’m really not sure I can manage much more of this.
But there are a few lindy hoppers who made it through to the final 100. But man, I’ve been watching for almost an hour and a half. And it’s horrible.
The other really annoying part is the way it’s cut up and stuck back together – lots of short, snappy bits. No where near enough long, long sequences where we just watch the dancers and assess their abilities. Which of course suggests (like we really need it suggested) that the dancing is really only important for brief moments of spectacle and that the real drama is in the judging and backstage stuff.
It’s all a bit painful. I’m also a bit sceptical of comments about including the young aboriginal bloke because he brings ‘diversity’ to the program. Hm. And the woman from El Salvadore telling her (quite terrible) story to a pretty wet soundtrack…. kind of clumsy and chunky and nasty.
[good news: there’s a new series of Good News Week coming. Bad news: it’s on channel 10]
Ok, it’s supposed to be over now, and we’re supposed to be watching Billy Holiday. But it’s not. Oh man.

look at this interesting thing

Some artists in York (UK) hooked some lights up to York Minster cathedral which responded to sound. As people (and passing vehicles) made noises, lights were projected onto the facade of the cathedral, moving up the contours of the building.
This clip is kind of annoying to listen to, but it makes for fascinating viewing.