I’m full of surprises. Oh yes, I’m whiley. Full of whiles.
Yesterday we found The Complete Decca Studio Recordings or Louis Armstrong and the All Stars. And I love it. All 6 discs of it. I know I may seem like I’m 100% old skool swinging big band jazz, but I’m not. I also like groovy, slinky crap from the 1950s. And just you wait – once I’m through with Satch I’m getting into the Nat King Cole set the Squeeze got a while ago. And I will totally go all ballad on yo ass.
…
woah. That was some scary shit. Guess who’s been reading far too many witty american ‘professional’ blogs? Me, me, me, me mememememememe!
Yes, home alone, a chocolate brownie disseminating sugary goodness into my stimulant-susceptible me.
Today was my second day out of the house! No, wait, third:
Day 1: into the city, saw King Kong (it fucking rraaaaaawwwwwwwked! yeah! 10 out of 10 kongs! yeah!), bought some presents, got tired. Ate Nandos for lunch. Don’t ask me why. Oh, go on then. It’s because of the salad. They’re about the only place near the Hoyts at Melbourne Central that sells nice salad. And I’m all about salad at the moment. Salad and meat. I think I’m blaming yoga.
Day 2: rode bike to shop for lunch things. Bought two outside chairs ($10 each) that fit into a bag I could sling over my shoulder. So I did. I slung them both over my shoulder and rode home with all my shopping. And got rained on. And got seriously snotty and shitty, discovering I probably wasn’t up to that much slinging and riding. Later, after fit of pique (or perhaps just a case of the shitty pants) and a lie down, I went back to the shops with the Squeeze for more groceries. Bought attractive parrot-shaped arnotts biscuit tin. Would post photo but amn’t that nerdy a blogger yet (but just you wait – nothing has contributed so much the collation of useless detritus in public discourse as flickr. And I’m all about contributing).
Day 3: rode bike to bike shop to test drive and possibly purchase new bike. A little tired and tres snotty, I waited while imbecilic shop boy failed to find bike I’d asked be made up for me to test drive (and purchase) last week, and also rung to confirm again later that week. No luck. Another fit of pique, or perhaps just another case of the shitty pants, and I flounce out (as much as one can when blowing one’s nose in a full hanky and dodging children in the grip of a new-bike-for-Christmas frenzy).
More presents purchased.
And a lovely trip to bike shop #2 later, and I’m cheering. While Strange Man did try to sell me a $725 bike when I had already made it clear that $600 was my limit with what I felt was as suitably unambiguous a statement as was necessary (given the circumstances): “I’m poor, so I can only afford to spend $600,” I left him with the request that he make up a street bike for me to rest drive (and possibly purchase) on Wednesday.
Yes, yes, I do realise that hauling all my shopping around on a delicate (yet so pleasingly light and speedy) road bike will probably bust a spoke or ten, and produce multiple punctures, but fuck. I want it. And I want it light. And we’re not trading in old Greeny, so I can keep old Greeny for shopping.
What is wrong with these bike shop fuckers? I’m so totally buying a new bike. But I’m so not going to buy one without a test drive. I know it’s goddamn Christmas rush for bikes, but fuck. I’m a local, a serious biker, and I’m absolutely going to be back for services, add-ons and all that repeat-service shit. So SERVE me!
Anyhoo, I have hopes for the guy at bike shop #2, despite The Squeeze’s declaration that he’s weird (as well as The Squeeze’s subsequent refusal to shop there, despite its proximity and superior work, superior to bike shop #3 anyways). I mean, geez, Strange Man recognised the value of old Greeny (despite his refusal to take a malvern star in trade for some slick new young gun bike), declaring Greeny a ‘workhorse’, while also noting that my new young gun bike will be my bike for really riding fast.
I like it that the man appreciated the value of old Greeny (workhorse = the best way to win this horsey-girl’s heart), as well as also pandering to my (obviously) somewhat misplaced faith in my own declaration that I am a Serious Bike Person, as well as to the thought that I may at some point ride really fast.*
So I’m so going back to bike shop #2 on Wednesday to test drive (and possibly buy) the new young gun bike.
And FUCK I’m going to ride home fast. Really fast.
*I know that I will. Once I’m on my young gun bike. Old Greeny is, as has been mentioned, a workhorse. New young gun will be more of a thoroughbred, and consequently far more appropriate for riding fast. Or even really fast.
