further jack and jill misgivings

my misgivings about entering the jack and jill increase…

…when I received the “Important Competitor Info!” email from the organisers today. I feel it’s best to mistrust exclamation marks in a subject line. I’d entered thinking I’d be up for a bit of fun, but now it’s all getting far too serious –

Along with the excitement and fun, there are a few important pointers to help things run as smoothly as possible in the night.
1. Please arrive at Collingwood Town Hall at 7pm!
2. The process for your arrival is to go to the registration desk in the foyer. The wonderful ladies on the door will check that you are registered as a competitor before, allowing you free entry into the event.
3. Once the registration table allow you through, please move to the Competitor Registration table. At this table your registration will be checked and competitor numbers will be issued (Please note: every lead and all girls in the Jack & Jill will require numbers). Remember you are not allowed to compete unless your entry fee is FULLY paid and you have been issued a number if required.
. IT IS IMPORTANT that you do this before
4. The competitor meeting at 7.30pm!
where all competitors will be briefed on the specifics of each event. Please make sure you are present for this!!!! The order for the Swing Showcase will be drawn at this briefing and the order of Jack and Jill heats will also be announced.
5. All Competitor numbers must be worn on the back or rear, so judges can see clearly. Not on legs, bottom of skirts, or other imaginative places etc.

Far too many exclamation marks. Really, are four absolutely necessary? Still no word about the start-time for the jack and jill – not even on the website. I canÂ’t stand the thought of sitting (or standing, as seems more likely) about til IÂ’m on. I have almost no interest whatsoever in watching the ‘showcaseÂ’ categories – I am prone to derisive snorts and disrespectful exclamations at inappropriate moments. I know I shouldnÂ’t, but I canÂ’t help but laugh at the misfortunes of others. ItÂ’s not so much that they canÂ’t dance – thatÂ’s not what IÂ’m laughing at – itÂ’s more the earnestness of their participation.
For godÂ’s sake.

All this and IÂ’m still gagging at the thought of the latest group email from this crew – IÂ’m really not up for the whole ‘familyÂ’ bullshit thing. It really makes me ill to read things like the comment that they are “truly the largest dedicated swing family in the world”, particularly when you keep in mind that you have to pay to join this family. Eeek. I think of Manson every time I read these sorts of comments.
ItÂ’s all getting a bit too nauseating.

But how to back out gracefully? And do I really want to forfeit my $12? I need an excuse. HavenÂ’t I got a thesis to write